There has been a huge fuss about the book “50 Shades of Grey.” Even if you live deep under a rock like me, you have at least heard of it if not read it. It has women drooling. I have no idea why, because I have not read it, but it does. That got me thinking today in the car about what I fantasize about and trust me, it has nothing to do with anything in that book. If you asked any mother what she most would want, a man with a whip and chains would likely not be the first thing that came to mind. Five minutes of quiet time on the other hand might be. So, I decided to create a list called the “50 Shades of Motherhood,” that lists that things that most moms truly get excited about!
1. Getting 5 minutes of quiet time without having to give the children cough medicine.
2. Being about to visit the bathroom alone and pee with the door closed.
3. Not stepping on Legos or Barbie shoes 2,358 times a day.
4. Having a floor stay clean for an entire day, without the need to re-sweep or re-mop.
5. An empty laundry basket.
6. Clothing not stained with spit up, drool or vomit.
7. An unsolicited thank-you.
8. A foot rub.
9. A back massage with nothing expected in return.
10. Children who do chores without whining.
11. A day without children arguing or fighting with each other.
12. A quiet car ride.
13. Not having to share dessert with children.
14. Actually finishing a book.
15. An hour without crying.
16. Not being asked what’s for dinner. Trust me, it’s always food.
17. Not being asked “Are we there yet.”
18. No pee on the bathroom floor.
19. Well behaved children in public.
20. Control of the TV for one night.
21. A mowed lawn you didn’t have to nag for.
22. Dinner cooked by someone else.
23. A freshly made bed.
24. Flowers without asking.
25. A hug in public from an older child.
26. Being told they are pretty.
27. Having the time to do their hair and makeup.
28. A shopping spree.
29. Breakfast in bed on a day other than Mother’s Day.
30. Unsolicited “I love you’s” from children.
31. No grass stains for a week.
32. Shoes taken off at the door.
33. Clean rooms!
34. A maid service.
35. A clean car.
36. An empty dishwasher.
37. Fresh smelling towels and clean sheets.
38. No feet smell in the children’s closets.
39. A month without illness.
40. Quiet bedtime with no drinks of water, millions of pee trips, or kids talking to each other.
41. Any book at bedtime other than fox in socks for the millionth time.
42. The death of the PBS show Caillou.
43. No one in trouble at school.
44. Not having to say no, stop, don’t or ewwww for a day.
45. Your favorite song on the radio.
46. A morning show you can listen to with the kids in the car and not be afraid of what is coming next.
47. Clean animal cages.
48. Children who brush teeth without being asked.
49. 4th grade math homework you don’t have to Google.
50. A girls only vacation.
Have any you would like to add?