Funny Pregnancy Quotes

Pregnancy isn’t always beautiful and sometimes it can be downright funny. I wanted to share some quotes about pregnancy I ran across so that you could all share in a laugh with me. Don’t get me wrong, being pregnant is a magical thing, but these are still funny!

“If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters.” – Nora Ephron

“You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.” – Dave Barry

“If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternatively, there would never be more than three in a family.” – Lawrence Housman

“Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.” – Joyce Armor

“I’m a Pregasauraus…mess with me and you’ll be extinct.” – author Unknown

“Unless you are the one who put this baby in here or the one who will take it out, you are not allowed to touch my belly!” – Author Unknown

“They say it’s less traumatic for the baby because it’s in water. But certainly more traumatic for the other people in the pool.” – Elayne Boosler


  1. I never heard any of them either but I like the first quote.. Pretty cute, those days your all over the board with your emotions!!

  2. I agree with the one by Dave Barry. It is so awkward if you ask someone about their pregnancy and they are not pregnant!

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