When my oldest son was 15 months old, I knew something wasn’t quite right. His temper and mannerisms were way different than other children his age. As he got older, he started having behavioral issues in school. I even took him out of first grade for a year because I thought it was a maturity issue. Through the years, we eventually sought out the help of a counselor and discovered that he has ODD or Oppositional Defiant Disorder.
Unfortunately, not many people know about ODD or how it can affect a child and household. Even fewer people understand how to effectively deal with a child who has ODD when he is acting out, and more often than not, it comes off as “bad parenting.” This is a judgement I have learned to deal with over the years as a mom of a child with a behavioral disorder, and I don’t wish this feeling of judgment on anyone. That is why I am taking a stand in the #SisterhoodUnite initiative to promote parents standing behind on another instead of passing judgement and hatred.
Every time I was called into the school, I could see the look of disdain on the principle and teacher’s faces, as they explained to me how “I” could help my child. How they told me what consequences I could set, as if it wasn’t something I had ever thought of before. Eventually, the judgement played a big factor in me deciding to homeschool my oldest alongside his brothers. Ultimately, he could be in a controlled environment that could control his actions and allow him to get good grades. It didn’t hurt that it put an end to most of the judgement I faced as a mom.
I catch myself doing it too from time to time though. We all do, be honest. If you see a child acting up and misbehaving in public, your immediate thought usually goes to the parent wondering why “he or she” can’t do a better job at disciplining their child. The simply fact is though, that we don’t know the whole story. It is just as easy to offer a helping hand or encouraging word as it is to lash out with judgement, which helps no one. Watch this incredible #SisterhoodUnite video produced at Mom 2.0 with insight from real moms.
That is why Similac has developed the Sisterhood of Motherhood site. It is a safe place where parents can gather to help hold each other up and not tear each other down with judgement. Their goal is to have everyone “just say no” to judgement and realize that we are all in this parenting gig together. Want to help support other parents and put an end to judging? Visit the Similac Facebook page and list one way that you plan to help end the mommy wars using the #SisterhoodUnite hashtag. My motto for stopping the mommy wars is below. Not everyone is going to have the same ideas on parenting, but everyone has to do what works best for them.
I am really excited to see that Similac has partnered with the Duff sisters as part of their campaign against judgement. I remember watching Hillary Duff on TV when I was younger, and she is still an inspiration today as she works with her sister and Similac to help bring awareness and hopefully an end to the mommy wars.
Have you left your way to stop the mommy wars on the Similac Facebook page? I would love to see your ideas, feel free to share them with me using the #SisterhoodUnite hashtag, because no parent should ever feel inadequate and alone when they are doing their best.
This post is written in collaboration with Similac, all opinions are my own.