In light of some recent comments I have gotten on my blog about how if my children get my couch dirty or break a nick knack I must be a horrible parent with completely unruly children, I have decided to write a poem for all of you perfect parents out there. You know who you are! Those who think your poo doesn’t stink and that you have the most perfect little angels who are likely cussing up a storm behind your back at school. I prefer to be perfectly imperfect and to know that my children are imperfect but happy and generally well behaved. I would be scared if they were robots like your kids.
To The Perfect Parents
You wake up three hours early to perfectly arrange your hair
You make pristine homemade lunches with the utmost of care
You press and iron until your fingers or sore
For the sweet little angels you say you adore.
You obsess over their appearance and send them to school
With instructions to listen to the teacher and obey the golden rule
You look at the other children and parents with disgust
Ironing and primping are always a must.
Who cares if they played with their kids a little too long
Sending them to school less than perfect is simply wrong
How can they let their children run and play?
There is no time for that, kids must appear perfect in public you say
Each day you chastise and judge with a sneer
You lie and say your children have never shed a tear
“My kids have never broken a thing”
:You must be a horrible parent” your judgment rings
I’ve got news for you perfect parents though
My children will grow up happy because you reap what you sow.